Monday, 28 September 2009


I remember walking to Stonebridge park station everyday when I was still in high school. Early in the morning, on my way there, I would always see this boy (very small, no taller than my bathtub) walking past me in a strop. I would see him from afar- his tiny legs developing a 'bop'. Music was blazing through his mobile phone (I guess his mother couldn't afford ear-plugs). He would walk past me with the dirtiest look on his face (in which I call the 'Screwface'). His eyes would be fixed on me - I would be on my way to an exam, while he would be on his way to primary school.

This miss-hap would also happen in the afternoon when I am walking back from school with a friend. You could hear the child's music from a mile off. The child would walk past us both, forcefully staring in our eyes. This happened a good couple of times until my exams where over and I needed not to go High school anymore.

And I know what your thinking:
This writer is a punk!
But I must reinforce the fact that I could of easily dropped kick the child and told him to calm himself down, or I could have picked him up and post him on a letterbox, so the results would be fatal if he attempted to jump off...but I resisted. I resisted because it's not necessarily the child that has got it wrong, but his whole generation...and trying to correct a whole generation while still maintaining your own blog is hard work, so I'll give it a pass. But staying on the topic of 'new generations', I have noticed that the children get worse as the years go by, or maybe I just become more vigilant as I grow up.

On my 17th Birthday, my big cousin said to me 'this is the last year of your youth...enjoy it'. And then it hit me, the nail on the head, I am still a child. So many years of my childhood where thrown away because I thought I was a big man, still asking my mum for lunch money. I know the younger ones want to be more independent, but when a five year old walks up to me saying 'wah gwarn', it gets me slightly annoyed.

'Doth not the young ones know that I shall smite them upon the road side if thou wouldest act unruly?'
-The complete works of Dr. Zoomah Ranks [1842]

What happened to 'respect your elders'? Or even worse...where are our elders?
I might have to conclude with a Part 3 on this
Stay tuned

Monday, 21 September 2009


School kids get on my nerves. Young people get on my nerves. I never knew why the Year 10s slapped me across the head in the corridor when I just started high school, or why the second years looked at me so hard when I first started college, but now I know...

I don't know what is is. When I was younger, I had no problem with the older ones, but they couldn't stand to look at me. I now find myself in my second year of college, looking down on the younger ones. I don't think anything happened to trigger it off, I suppose it was something I grew into (think of it as the 'second stage of puberty' - the road to becoming a man). But be not misled, I attempted to like the younger ones, but ended up getting more upset.

For example, I needed to interview the first years of my college the other day for my media coursework. My interviewees were either scared stiff, or came up with answers like:
'umm...yea...ah..yeah..I don't know init...really's one of dem ones zimme....sorry what did you ask?'
...I don't like them

...And the secondary school kids? Don't even get me started with them!

Answer me this: Unless your friend has extreme hearing problems, why do you have to speak so loud on the bus? They are sitting right next to you child!

I just get annoyed when I am walking down the road and see them shouting in their little groups, with their fresh blazers and hiking backpacks full with pack lunches and P.E kits...the bag is the same size as you for crying out loud!

I am not too angry at Primary school kids, they are okay. Some of them make me laugh at times, but those brats in high school...they make me sick. So sick infact...I am going to have to do a PART 2 on this!
Stay Tuned

Saturday, 19 September 2009

I HATE MONDAYS: Introduction

Oh the woes of a monday...
You live your life on the weekend without a care in the world. You may go out and visit an old friend, you might just go to the cinema to watch a film...hey, you might even just stay in your house and chill... And you have all right to do so...because it is the weekend.

But there is a problem in this equation: There are only 48 hours in a weekend (if you exclude friday). So when Sunday expires, you end up in Monday, the day when you realise you cannot stay in your house, you cannot see your old friends, and you can't press the snooze button too much...because its time to work. Your labour now begins and the weekend seems so far away..
Oh how I hate Mondays

ZoOm understands your pain, so I have come up with something that may brighten up your day every now and again...
Every Monday, I will be posting a blog on the things I hate, some things will be humorous, some things would be issues that really bother me. If you hate mondays like me...this is a series of posts you should look out for. This series will run out until i have run out of things to it will be running for a while...

Stay Tuned

Thursday, 17 September 2009

Air time...Pt.1

This article has no motive...but I would take this time out to say thankyou for the support you have been showing, and I hope that you stay tuned that much longer.
Im currently writing a series called 'I HATE mondays'...I'll give more information on that tomorrow. In the meantime, enjoy this picture I did this afternoon.
kanye west
Stay Bless

Tuesday, 15 September 2009

Far From Marvelous

This was written a while ago, but it is a brief introduction to what I want to show you all very soon.

Cartoons and children's television played a major part of my childhood, obviously. I remember watching the Disney channel early in the morning while clinging tight to my mickey mouse doll. The magic and wonders, the happiness and total innocence (supposedly) proved to have made a lasting impression on my life. But as I got older, Goofy was no longer satisfactory. Later on in the years I would go downstairs, early on a saturday morning with my bowl of cereal, to watch Fox Kids with my older brother. During those three hours, we would watch shows like X-Men, Spiderman, The incredible Hulk, Fantastic 4, and who can forget the Silver Surfer? Those were amazing shows. The leading characters were heroic, strong, captivating. Each still was intricately drawn with such detail to ensure my eyes where glued to the television screen at all times - oh, how I live my childhood.

Now that I have grown up (mind you, I am still trying to get out of my Marvel phase) it has been brought to my attention that Disney (the entertainer of my early years) has now bought the rights to Marvel Comics (The story tellers of my latter years) - Well I'll be...Mickey Mouse has just Pimped out Spiderman!

Marvel sold their company for $4 billion, which to some may seem reasonable, noting that Marvel comics is a $3 billion business, and the worth of the business could boost to $5 billion if given into the caring hands of Disney.

Do I find this upsetting? Of corse I do! Do not get me wrong, I love both businesses, but separately. Disney nurtured me as a toddler, and Marvel made me wonder while I was growing up, but seeing the two companies merge into one is borderline impurity. Fair enough, Marvel has the potential to become an even bigger business when in the hands of Disney, but I do not want to see 'Spiderman and Friends' with Goofy trying to web-sling in New York City, prancing around on rooftops like a complete idiot on the Disney channel, or seeing Xievier recruiting donald duck and his girlfriend as the new addition to the X-Men --impurity!

Some say however, that it wouldn't be like that. Disney, at the end of the day, are business people, and they would well know that creating a show called 'Bedtime Stories with Gambit' will do the business no good. If they are as clever as I assume, they would keep Disney-DIsney and Marvel-Marvel. If Disney chooses to keep everything the way it is supposed to then I would find no reason to complain, but if I ever turn on the Television to see Miley Cyrus breakdancing on stage with Wolverine, I am going to go postal. 

Post a comment...or better yet, join the argument on Facebook
Lets get Talking..
Stay Bless

Saturday, 12 September 2009

The Future Of Fashion Review!!!

'The Future of Fashion' put the pedal to the metal at Sosho last night, featuring the works of over 25 designers. Many fashion fanatics gathered together upstairs, while the designers got ready to wow the crowd downstairs. I came down with TeamJESUS (a rapidly growing Christian company) to sell T-shirts downstairs during the after party.
Coming back from the event, I could say that I was truly impressed by the talent that was showcased on the night. I was caught by the stunning dresses created by Yetty D. I was especially feeling the colorful works designed by Playdot Clothing. Without thought a major shout would have to be given out to Jesus Loves Me, who represented Christ well on the runway.
Mind you though, it was not only fashion that was being exibited. I remember there is a moment when you could hear the noise of everyone chattering at the same time, then suddenly everyones conversations were muted when they heard the soft cords of the piano followed by the amazing vocals given by Daley. G.R.E.E.D.S also got the crowd thinking with his first poem, touching on the consequences of knife crime.
At the end of the show came the after party, where I went downstairs to sell T-shirts with TeamJESUS, sharing space with clothing lines like Odd Kingdom, who I marked as the ones with the most unique style and creative thought.
Despite the the long intervals between each showcase, I must say that 'The Future of Fashion' stepped up to the plate and showcased some of London's best.
We need more of this...

Thursday, 10 September 2009

True Ballers

Rated PG: Some of this content may offend.

Gangsterish may not be in the English dictionary but I find it to be the perfect word to use for what I saw this afternoon. I was strolling around in an unknown area (they said I was in North London, but I am sure I saw a cow on the bus ride there). I just came out of Gregg's (two steaming sausage rolls and a coke were purchased) and I was looking around for a bench to sit on. The place where i was at, was a predominantly white community, so I was shocked when I heard the sound of snare drums in the air (no offence). My ear automatically picked up to the song, the lyrics stated:
'Make that money...Make that money!'

Hip Hop was pumping loud in a place I least expected, so I look to see where the sound was coming from. I look to the left, I see no stereo, I look to the right, nothing. I look downwards and I see a man in a wheel chair with a phone on loudspeaker, pumping the song 'Make the money...Make that money!'. The automatic wheel chair cruised through the streets, causing pedestrians to move out of his way. He was white with the most serious screw-face you have EVER seen. This dude was mean!

After he strolled past me, I eventually found I place to sit with my good friend Scripted. Peacefully, I tried to enjoy my two sausage rolls and coke. Ten minuets later, the man in the wheel chair strolled past me again, but this time with slows jams playing through his stereo. He was circulating the area, so I assumed he was looking to rob some people, so I quickly grabbed my stuff and headed for the bus back home.

On the way back, from the top deck I saw a group of teenagers (possibly three or four of them) walking down the road with a familiar face leading the gang in the middle -
Was it not my guy in the wheel chair?!

Maybe my perception of people in wheel chairs was distorted, but I would have NEVR of thought in a million years that a man in a wheel chair could be so gangster. No wheel chair or disability was stopping him, and that is why I have to use the word 'gangsterish' because he is just that fly.

'Gangster Wheel-chair guy' if you are reading, I just want to say you are big on the roads
and I hope everything works out for you
Nuff respect

Tuesday, 8 September 2009

I go by the name of..

Conceived in '91...Establish in '92...awakened in '09 I go by the name of zoOm.
It sounds cheesy and I know your probly in your seat thinking (look at this clown)
but I am no clown..far from it..

Here...I have a photograph to prove it :

Welcome to the wonderful world of ZoOm! I just want to say thankyou for taking out the time to read this...but I guess the true question is: Would you be willing to read more?
I am a writer, so if you are wonderful enough to follow this blog, you may see on some occasions, large amounts of writing splashed on your page...But it's all just my thoughts...will you read them?

I am looking to spark discussions in your streets and colleges, your living rooms and your starbucks.
I am looking to make you think, be ediyfied more than just being entertained.
I am looking to take over the internet, then eventually the world - I learnt from Pinky and the Brain's attempts!
I am looking to provoke the thoughts of many, and even if it's only three people reading my blog, it will be a constant reminder to them that the revolution is comming so be prepared!
In the meantime...I going to continue writing, until one of these things make it big...and even them I am going to keep pushing my way forward...

Yeah Thats right!
Anyways Stay Bless.
I enjoyed your visit...keep coming down.